We haven’t launched yet, so we don’t have testimonials

but the wordpress theme we’re using has this page with stock photos so pretend they’re jerks

“I’m a real piece of work at a Starbucks. My order is stupid and complicated just so I can complain they got it wrong. My local barista got my address and sent me Jerk! The Magazine, and now I know I’m garbage.– Donna G., Magnitek Industries

“Do you know how many times I made my barber trim my beard to get this perfect just-past-scruff look? 12 times. He went millimeter by millimeter because I’m a real asshole.

– Percy C., Accounting Solutions

“This dickhead in my frat dared me I couldn’t grow my hair this high. I showed him by doing it, and he showed me by sending me a magazine about what a jerk I am. Mutually assured destruction, bro.”

– John P., Wine Country Tours

“The guys in my office sent me this magazine because I’m ‘difficult’ but it’s just because they can’t handle a powerful woman in the workplace.

It’s not because I microwave fish in the communal kitchen. Fish is delicious and they’re just jealous of the lunch I brought from home.

– Marianne W., Office Class Resources

“Yo, did you see Perks of Being a Wallfower? I sure fucking have. Tell everyone in my film studios 101 class about it all the time. They got me this magazine as a joke because they know I’m actually very cool like Patrick in Perks of Being a Wallflower.”

– Mark B., Dynamic Industries

“Receiving this magazine in the mail really made me look long and hard at myself. Honestly, it made me sad. But I think that’s what the anonymous person who sent it wanted. I hope you’re happy.

I’m not.

I’m not.”

– Julie L., Sharp Office Supplies